I find it helpful to write things down as I stumble through this new and very foreign territory. As I figure this out, I may need to prepare a "how to" book for widows who are planning on dating again.
One rule I've found is to listen to your children. If they are adults, they have opinions, and no one knows you better. Close friends are valuable, too.
I am not good at listening immediately. However, it's time to listen when the people close to you prove to be correct.
My loved ones say to pick a man with geographic proximity and free time. The guy needs to be healthy and financially and emotionally stable. I need a "partner in crime." While very independent, I love to do things with others, not everything, but a lot of sharing time is good for me.
It's hard to find guys my age without baggage. The universe knows I have too much of my own. The key is that the strong, stoic type who doesn't share will resent my openness and possibly feel I don't care about them. I do and can scale it back, but please let me know if you think that way.
If they don't have baggage, I guess the question is, "Have they lived, or are they just terminally dull?"
The problem with dating apps is that sometimes you feel like you have a bunch of interesting people and who is the suitable possibility? In real life versus the virtual, one likely meets fewer men, and there's less of a feeling that you are gathering them in a sieve and shaking out the lumps.
(I think I've been baking too much.)
That seems like a terrible place to end this essay, but I need to get to my gym, or the effects of the baking will not make me happy!
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