Nothing spices up February like discovering your on-again-off-again gentleman friend is shopping for new prospects online.

 I know you find my dating experiences entertaining. I was "on again" with my long-term gentleman friend when I saw an email from Match asking me to rejoin the site. It gave me my friend as an ideal match.

 I went to look it up and saw he has just revised his Match profile. Me, in a harem? No chance.

Of course, when confronted, he was angry and defensive and resorted to gaslighting.

"How dare you when we've known each other for less than a year?" he exclaimed. My calculations put August 2022 at 2.5 years ago. I also mentioned that I wasn't checking up on him—Match offered him as a good prospect for me.

 Of course, he lied about his age and stretched the truth based on what I read. The cynic in me assumes he probably researched Chat GPT for an ideal profile write-up. I'm very forthright, and he learned what I thought about that.

 When I told him what had happened, he resorted to telling me that his profile had been on Match for years. I know he left the site for a while, and this representation of himself is very recent. He had a current employment history, and he mentioned his one-year-old granddaughter. She and I share a birthday, and it was just a few weeks ago.

 I hadn't set out to investigate, but I’d apparently crossed a line. Information is just one of the risks of posting on the Internet. People learn and know things about you.

 I decided this argument was a big deal, so I will try Match again and move on. It's challenging to do so; I like his sense of humor and intellect and would like to remain friends. Being intimate friends won't work, but friends could have possibilities, but that may be out of the question.

 So, I joined Match, only to find that it might be a long slog. I just want to meet people, learn about them, and enjoy a pleasant coffee or a delicious lunch in a cool spot. Go to a farmer's market or some other innocuous event? I don't want to commit based on a phone call or a couple of dates. The last time I was on the site, I did make a couple of charming and helpful casual friends. I had my ideal first date, though it didn't lead to anything more. There may be some good experiences ahead. 

 However, my first couple of contacts got me a scripted essay about a guy and what he planned for his relationship with the person with whom he connected. I know people make demands on partners, but living in a movie script is an acting job I can pass on. Another person wanted to be sure we were an ideal match before he would arrange to meet with me. He also regretted his house was being torn up for some repair work. A lot to assume that I'd want to have anything to do with his house before we even met!

 Just wanting to meet people and enjoy a conversation or an event is not the kind of dating this current batch of prospects is looking for. But I am an optimist. I'm counting on not all older single men being weird. That may be a misplaced hope.

Stay tuned—because, if nothing else, the world of online dating is never dull.

What's Happening

 

It is January, and time to organize and plan new things. This post is focused on my personal craft passions. My inventory is ample and old and needs to be used or sent elsewhere. Sorting that out seems essential. I have spent some time analyzing my process, and I'll be more productive if I organize products according to how I use them. 

I am not usually a cardmaker. The small real estate is a challenge, and 6x6 paper pads lend themselves to cards because of their scale. As a 12x12 scrapbook page maker, I mainly use 6x6 for die-cuts. However, a couple of orders from Scrapbook.com came with Paper Rose Winter Blooms 6x6 pads. I'm putting Christmas away; cards came to mind. I did not want to store these pads. I determined I'd rather store a head start on Christmas cards. So, I've got that jump start on next year's holiday, and you thought the craft stores' Christmas in July and August was early, LOL!

My craft supply stash is large and ancient, as is my camera collection. 

I have considered crafting on my YouTube channel. I like watching other people's processes and ideas, and I know I'm not the only one. So, I signed up for a video production and editing class at SCC. I looked for suggestions on YouTube for equipment, and I learned that my 12-year-old Canon EOS 6D is suggested as an affordable starter camera. I already owned it, and the lens was recommended by one person. When you already have the recommended equipment, it's more than affordable. Alas, my GoPro is version 3 and almost at museum status. I don't need one. I am considering upgrading my iPhone, too. I have a good iPhone Lavalier microphone, but I will get new microphones for my DSLR. 

My first day in class-

I have not used the video option on my DSLR, so I need to learn that. The iPhone has so many capabilities that I never took the time to learn how to use that part of my Canon 6D. However, the DSLR is mandatory for this class, so I will need to know. I may be out of my depth; we'll see!

It's nice to be back to blogging. I'm slowly reintroducing those things that made me so happy before. I have been inspired by so many online creators, and it's not just their creative work that inspires me. Victoria Calvin inspired me to go to my gym for a workout today. 

 Good Morning!

It's the start of a New Year, so I must write new blog posts. I have been writing a lot but haven't posted here.

I did begin to write poetry. One poem was published—I'll add it at the end of this post. Another is almost done and should be published soon. 

I've been at a standstill in some of my creative efforts. All that energy has been going into construction improvements of my rental property and home. I also had a part-time job this past year, which had me learning more about the care of persons with substance use disorder. I needed to understand more details on the business side of health and regulations. Lots of learning there, too. My position is ending, but I would love more medical work. Not direct patient care, though. That's something fulfilling, but I want to be mostly retired, and the physical demands of my past work in OBGYN are for younger folks. I do enjoy the areas of quality control and review of care work. I honed those skills when Chief of Pharmacy and Therapeutics at Kaiser Central Valley, California. I'm learning about accounting, too. I have decided to study accounting, too. That might help if I pursue board positions.

Meanwhile, my art needs more than sketching out ideas. The process is enjoyable, but I hate interruptions, so it is difficult to begin when I know I may have little peace. As things are settling down, I should be able to stretch those creative wings. I did not stop learning about art. I improved my Illustrator skills with a college course. I got an A, but there is still so much to learn! I have some workbook texts on my desk to keep at it. Photoshop is something that needs more exploration, too. I have a lot of skills, but since I have not done much Digi scrapping lately, I can use some refresher study. I have plans to learn more about video work, too!

I enjoy learning and have studied history, archaeology, and art in small snatches. 2025 marks the 800th anniversary of sealing the 1225 version of the Magna Carta. I found a good class about the Magna Carta on Coursera. It explains many legal technicalities well, and I find it fascinating.

My last posts were about dating again after widowhood. I have stepped away from that for the moment. It would be nice to have a life partner, but I focused on fun with my family. I did meet someone who weaves in my life now and then. I will likely try dating again. There's drama and much humor in the process, so those who enjoy the funny parts of my writing may have some enjoyable reading in the future.

That should bring you up to date, my dear readers. Life has been challenging in widowhood. As those familiar with the Bible know, it's an eons-old story. Still, fun things happen and make for good stories. As things are more settled, I can write about them.

I promised to end this with my poem, published in the July/August 2024 edition of Sierra Sacramento Valley magazine. However, it was not my only contribution this year. My photo of fall leaves is on the cover of the September/October issue. For more information, check the archives of this excellent magazine.

Manitoba at age four

Our house has four small spaces.

Two bedrooms, a kitchen, and a living room.

Our home has no running water.

Our outhouse is in the back, 

By the telephone and power lines.

An artesian well is up the avenue.

In the first tiny bedroom, there are two crib beds

Over one, on the wall, the classic, morbid "Now I Lay Me Down" children's prayer 

Embroidered by my convent-trained, French-speaking grandmother,

The last word misspelled "Aman."  

The other bedroom is crowded with a simple dresser and double bed,

A throw pillow atop the soft, nubby, diamond-patterned, cream-chenille spread.

In the kitchen,

On a counter sits an enamel basin, 

With a pitcher and ladle nearby.

On the floor, an oil drum slops pail 

Resting by an early-model electric stove.

A fly strip twists from a lightbulb above.

In the adjoining living room,

"Blue Tango," croons from a floor-model dial radio 

Fronted with a cloth of rough brown thread.

I cuddled against it in winter,

Like a hot water bottle snug in bed.

I enjoy being warm.

But this was summer in Manitoba. 

So I perch on the gray concrete slab 

In front of that blue shingle-sided home, 

Toasting in the sun —

A fresh-boiled perogie to a bannock bun.

Alone, away from an annoying younger brother.

I feel observed—perhaps, nearby, a vigilant father.

Even on farms then,

Most traffic was motorized vehicles. 

So, I watch, fascinated and ever-curious,

As an old dray with sides of slatted panels

Moves up the town road.

The driver and passenger perched on a board.

Two men, one young, one old.

The plodding nag halts, the wagon is secured,

If there is conversation, the words are unheard.

Into the load, one-handed, the strangers swing.

One in an inky leather vest wields iron tongs to sling

A blue-white block from the depths of soggy straw.

Later, I learn about ice houses.

Sometimes,

I still believe in magic.

By Karen Poirier-Brode, MD;CM

My continuing dating saga

 This morning, I criticized a supposed professional for lousy spelling when replying to a brief text message on a dating site. If grammatically challenged, please write “2 meet” not “too meet” on your post. You don’t sound professional, and I assume I’m being catfished. I’m likely in too snarly a mood to keep at this dating game if I’m picky about spelling, but I have standards for initial impressions. Sigh!

So, how’s dating going, you may ask? Many people look at a pretty face and don’t read one’s profile. They live too far away for a decent connection, join Match or eHarmony when where they belong is Tinder, or don’t say anything original - “You can’t be age 73,” as if I had never heard that before. In fairness to the guys wanting a short-term connection, a man I dated who only wanted short-term dating or hook-ups told me that for men over 50, their matches on Tinder were often high-priced hookers. Maybe trolling in the waters of sites designed for relationships seems safer. Perhaps they’ll catch a few fish, but for those of us trying to connect with someone, it creates a massive waste of time. No, I haven’t tried “Plenty of Fish.” I wonder if they have, it would fit my metaphor.

Then there are cats. Cats are excellent, but hanging around with cats requires me to be on high-dose steroids to survive. That’s not a healthful lifestyle. I’m allergic to all animals but particularly susceptible to cats. A definite stumbling block to otherwise promising relationships.

My dating life has featured a few flirtations, and you know about my other challenges in dating from previous posts. I did manage a nine-month situation-ship with an adorable, friendly guy. That is likely why I have yet to post since September. I liked his intelligence, looks, and life experience. However, the clinician in me has assessed him as having a “dismissive avoidant attachment style.” I adored him, but he was deeply uncomfortable with someone in touch with their emotions who wanted a real connection.

The good thing is that the guy I was fond of helped me figure out much financial stuff, as my late husband left me in a financial predicament. I’m all squared away now and very confident about my future security. Well, as much as anyone can be with the economy, our crazy, illogical government, and climate change, among other challenges.

Still, I have a comfortable life and am rich in things like family, friends, and pursuits. Still looking for love, though.

I'm Learning

Thanks to those following my dating saga.

I find it helpful to write things down as I stumble through this new and very foreign territory. As I figure this out, I may need to prepare a "how to" book for widows who are planning on dating again.

One rule I've found is to listen to your children. If they are adults, they have opinions, and no one knows you better. Close friends are valuable, too.

I am not good at listening immediately. However, it's time to listen when the people close to you prove to be correct.

My loved ones say to pick a man with geographic proximity and free time. The guy needs to be healthy and financially and emotionally stable. I need a "partner in crime."  While very independent, I love to do things with others, not everything, but a lot of sharing time is good for me.

It's hard to find guys my age without baggage. The universe knows I have too much of my own. The key is that the strong, stoic type who doesn't share will resent my openness and possibly feel I don't care about them. I do and can scale it back, but please let me know if you think that way. 

If they don't have baggage, I guess the question is, "Have they lived, or are they just terminally dull?"

The problem with dating apps is that sometimes you feel like you have a bunch of interesting people and who is the suitable possibility? In real life versus the virtual, one likely meets fewer men, and there's less of a feeling that you are gathering them in a sieve and shaking out the lumps.

(I think I've been baking too much.) 

That seems like a terrible place to end this essay, but I need to get to my gym, or the effects of the baking will not make me happy!

More reflections on online dating

I wonder how I'll feel when I look back at these blog posts in one year or five?

This new dating experience has been fascinating.

I have found a friend that I care for a great deal. Are we a match? I'm not sure. It's so early I'm trying to keep myself distant enough to not be hurt, but it may be too late. We'll see.

I've had some casual coffee/lunch dates to evaluate some other guys who've been interested. It hasn't been a great experience. One guy started with a tale about a woman I think he had thought was the one until he faced her unmitigated racism towards a nonwhite race. He was so disappointed he wanted to bring that up immediately. I share that reaction to this woman's comments, but it didn't seem the best start to our date. He also made a big deal about my comments in my profile about not wanting a controlling partner. He brought that up immediately and gave me a detailed list of the strong professional women in his family and how he wouldn't want to be controlling. I thought again he may have protested too much, likely based on prior experience. This came home when he told the wait staff that we were not interested in dessert without asking me. I don't need dessert, let's be clear, but it did seem arbitrary. He had strongly suggested an entrée that I did not want earlier, but I'd taken that to indicate the price point since he had started the lunch and insisted that he would pay this time. However, "this time" suggests that any "next time" would be a Dutch treat or be on me. I think there are red flags!

He never once offered me his surname nor asked mine, either. In fact, other than asking me about the last concert I attended before the pandemic onset, he didn't want to know much. I wonder if he thought my profile on the site was everything to know about me. Yes, I figured out who he is on the internet. Maybe he's done the same. Then again, perhaps another red flag.

And chemistry, so few guys seem ready to cultivate emotion. A lot of dates can be summed up as "boring." I am willing to see a person twice in many cases because I understand nerves can affect behavior. You can bring out laundry lists and insecurities as barriers because most of us are not professional daters or actors, and dating is very anxiety-provoking. 

Some guys tell me they've been at this for years without finding someone and limit themselves to one date. I am not surprised they have not found the right woman.

I hoped if I didn't find "the one," I'd at least make friends. Not so sure about that.

The continuing dating saga

Life goes on. I'm dating a bit. 

Most of my match.com connections seem pretty random. The algorithm does not consider a person's essay, and even essential criteria, like smoking, are ignored. Note that I'm highly allergic to cigarettes, wood fires, etc. 

Several conversations on the phone or at lunch have been missing chemistry. I need to laugh or feel very comfortable to want to continue to get to know a person.

Still, there are a couple of possibilities on both e-harmony and match.com. We'll see what comes of the connections.

I started this dating adventure, unsure where I wanted things to go.

I'm starting to be a bit clearer about what I want. I'm confident I want a relationship. That is more than friends, though starting as friends seems fine. Friends with benefits is a tricky one. If you want that closeness, you must be ready to explore a real relationship. I'm not talking prepared to tie the knot, but we want to spend time together, share experiences and care about each other. It's beyond casual dating.

One can "just have fun," but for me, it gets tricky.

I appreciate the insights into my personality on e-harmony. No real surprises. It noted my empathy and my strong desire for sharing activities. I like the summary comments like "a diplomat on the fence," "as pragmatic as necessary as open as possible," and " a thoughtful go-getter." I think the excellent qualities outweigh my not-so-desirable ones - the analysis did point out I can be stubborn. But, I naturally want to get to know people and generally have a sunny disposition. I appreciate that the compatibility quiz noted a partner should consider himself lucky that I  have an intriguing combination of comfort and drive. 

The site didn't mention one aspect of my personality: I'm an extroverted introvert. My late husband used to comment on this. A friend recently commented on this quirk. I believe it was telling stories about others to reveal something about myself. Hmmm...

The compliments I get on these sites have boosted my self-confidence. I know I don't look my age, but I'm very aware of ageism and have insecurities about my age and not being skinny. Some men like curvy, though.

Today I was a bit down about the dating experience, but my usual sunny disposition has kicked in, and I am feeling more positive.

I'd love to hear what others think about dating as a senior citizen. Comments are welcome. 

Learning about Love

 

Hi! I think my last couple of posts may have been a bit negative.

Two weeks in, I'm still using eharmony and Match.com. I was steered first to eharmony and then to Match.com by my younger friends and relatives. When I asked them which they met their significant other, they replied Tinder and Bumble. Hah! They want me to get introduced to the world of dating slowly. Very protective and sweet of them, I think. Match.com is one of the most popular sites.

In further research, I discovered that meeting someone online is somewhat better during the pandemic than meeting someone in shared activities or via friend introduction.

Whatever app one chooses has the possibility of a good relationship. 

I had thought Tinder was strictly for hookups/one-night-stands, but people find meaningful relationships there. However, I did get the warning that it can be something of a "S**t-show" there.

I've learned a few things while dipping my toes into the dating sea. I'm sure I'll learn more and refine these points as I go along.

First, if someone does not use their actual first name, they are likely too self-absorbed for a relationship. You may think it's caution on their part, but I've not found that so.

Second, if something doesn't feel right, it isn't. I spoke about "T" from New Jersey before. I never heard back after telling him I wanted a video call but did not close the conversation window on the app. A week later, while scrolling, I found his image blurred on the message board; the site had blocked him because he violated rules.

I'm learning about myself, too. I like flirting; I like funny people. It's not surprising; the best relationships and all my husbands were highly witty.

I knew I did not want to be a nurse or a purse. However, I'm finding it is what many men seek from a woman my age. 

I appreciate younger men who have ingrained lessons from the "me too" movement. They ask permission, even about the words they use like, "sexy",and are respectful, though they are likelier to want photos of one in yoga pants or a swimsuit, LOL!

I'd love to hear stories about your online dating experiences in the comments!

 

Sex, Lies and No Video Tapes

Photo was taken tonight as I write this blog entry.

Hair is a mess but proving my point my image is honest.

 

OK, the title says lies, and it says sex, and while there are plenty of lies, there is no sex ... well, not yet.

There may be none ever, as this online dating is very discouraging. I have not been at it very long, but there seem to be a lot of lies.

 

"T" from New Jersey might be a "bot." Very brief communications on messages and refuses to give his name or have a video conversation. (My video tape reference.) I told him, "I'm not really happy with doing the conversational heavy lifting and I need more identification before I go further in any communication."

I wondered if anyone would question my age. I told a guy I was really 72, and he disappeared. The photos are accurate (I look much younger than my stated age), and so is the information. Unfortunately, the guys I have been "matched" to are not as truthful as I am. In my last post, you read about Kenneth from Utah, who used internet photos to pose as a fellow named Mark from San Francisco.

I'm debating contacting a guy who is out of my age range. He's 5 years older than I am. I hate to be picky, but my limit is a couple of years older. It's just that guys seem to age faster than most women. Men much younger have checked me out, but no contact. I honestly do not know how I'd react to someone younger than 57.

The continuing saga of finding dates

 

Not going well! I got contacted by the amiable Mr. T on the East Coast. However, I'm not sure he is an actual person. The messages are incredibly brief. If he is for real, he ought to be available for a video visit and give me his full name. I think I'll drop the contact if I do not get more information. I don't need imaginary friends, LOL!

The matches on the site are not great. I was advised by e-harmony to check out a guy today that its algorithm thought would be compatible with me. Unfortunately, way off the mark! The profile-listed movie faves were Sound of Music, You've Got Mail, Ghost, Sleepless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally, and The Shack. Way too many "chick flicks" for me! And I think he was "too old" and moody for me, too!

At least he had a name and enough info to know he was real. He might be perfect for a sensitive 75-year-old woman, just not ideal for me. I have a much younger outlook on life.

I am tempted to try a different dating site. However, I promised myself I'd give this a couple of months; I just wanted to meet some interesting people. I'm not looking to fall in love immediately.

I was hoping for men with equivalent education and career history to mine. A guy who takes care of their teeth would be nice. A good match would be a kind, comfortable person who likes to travel and is funny and someone who'd tolerate my impatience and sometimes blunt speech. Also, he should be someone my kids would not find boring!

 

The EHARMONY Experience

I showed some of my eharmony matches to friends who commented, "The guys look too old for you." I remind my friends of my age. 

However, that remark is partly true. Some men look like they'd have the energy to keep up with me, but many look like they need the "nurse." I've been warned to avoid being a "nurse" or a "purse" prospect for the guys I connect with in real life or online.

The experience has been bizarre. After a few exchanges, I found what seemed like an amiable guy on the East Coast who said he was interested. He then has not returned to the eharmony site. Maybe he's just busy or has found someone he likes better. Who knows? A pleasant diversion for a few messages, and we'll see if he ever returns to the site.

Next was someone with more promise as he was closer, but "B" from San Mateo proved to be a very controlling individual in just a couple of messages. Goodbye!

Yesterday, I had a brief exchange with a guy to whom I gave my cell number. I got a message from the guy with what looks like a studio photo. The phone message said he was kenneth from e-harmony, and the # was from Utah. Since I'd chatted online with a Mark from San Francisco whose photos looked like the guy named kenneth in the image attached to the message (I've not matched with a kenneth), this seemed very fishy!

I've had a couple of other brief conversations, but nothing seems to be developing.

I've been researching online dating sites, and one's chances at finding people are judged to be equivalent to real-life; of course, real life is not yet providing enough social situations to meet anyone! I hope that finding "no one" is not the result of this online effort.

At least it's blog material, LOL!

So, online dating!

    Hello, blog world. I'm embarking on something new. It will seem too soon for some of you, but I have had time to prepare for Cal's death, and he wanted me to move on with my life. It's not as if I'm closing the door on my past. I miss him and likely always will, but the world is trying to sort itself out, even with CoVid still hovering. I'm trying to sort myself out, too. Life is short.

    So, online dating! I said new, but a few moments ago, 1983 flashed back, and I remember trying online dating then. It was definitely weird. I do not recall how one got into that scene. Lots of geeky people, I recall. It was pure DOS. I write too much - that is not surprising to anyone; I have a blog! I don't write here often, but how many people periodically write down their thoughts on a personal blog?

At any rate, I was spending too much time entering data, as I still am only a two-finger typist. The space was monitored, and the host interrupted and had me call him. He suggested I write my posts in another program and then import them into the program to let others onto the chat platform. Only one person could enter data at a time. He and I had a few conversations. I think he was some kind of entertaining voyeur. He probably hosted the site to get material for a comedy routine? I met a few guys and had a couple of personal meetings but no romances from that experience. It has been filed away in my mind until a few minutes ago.

So, my organizer and friend, Tara, recommended EHARMONY to me. I went on the site Monday and signed up. Since then, I've met a few friendly people, but only one has intrigued me. I've been chatting, verbosely, of course! Funny how I can be so quiet in person with people I do not know, but here I am on my blogs, podcasts, and social media, and now eharmony just putting it all out there.

It's the introverted extrovert that I am, I suppose.

It's rather fun getting to know another person this way. I miss the days when I'd catch a guy's eye from across a room and see him smile. Nowadays, there's a mask in the way, and who gets out much anyways? I think it could happen as the world opens up. I look a lot younger than my age, have always felt attractive, and have an energetic attitude. All this exercise I do to stay healthy keeps me active and fit. So even if online does not work out, I do not think I'm destined for a lonely life nor required to be a "nurse" or a "purse" to find a partner. I will not regret the online dating experience, even if it doesn't end up with a lasting relationship. So far, people seem very pleasant even though I've felt that many would not be the best match for me.

I'm waiting for guys to put themselves forward. I'm not bold enough, at least not yet, to make the first move.

The site is pretty flexible and easy to use. So, if you have been considering trying the online dating option in your life, keep an open mind and try it out.

I'm not always great about following up on the blog, but I'll probably make a few comments on social media.

It's a new chapter in my life. Maybe I'll be blogging more?

 

    

Calvin Edward Barwick 1933-2022

 Calvin Edward Barwick, age 88, of Sacramento, died quietly at home in his sleep on January 23, 2022, of advanced prostate cancer. 

Cal was born in Louisville, KY, the son of the late John Calvin and Mary B Lewis Barwick. He attended Male High School and, during that time, developed his tennis game, winning many tournaments and championships, including the 1951 KHSAA state championship in team tennis. 

His good friend, college roommate, and fraternity brother, Dave Thomas, remembers several enjoyable years with Cal as a member of the Kappa Alpha fraternity. 

After graduation, Cal proudly joined the US Navy to serve during the Korean conflict. He ended his service as a submariner on the training boat, the USS Sarda. He remained a life-long tinkerer of diesel engines.

Cal attended the University of Kentucky on a tennis scholarship and the GI bill to graduate with a commerce degree in 1960. Cal had a sense of humor and wry wit. He'd love to joke that he graduated in the top 99% of his class and see if people "got it."

Cal was very proud to have been designated by the Governor of Kentucky with the honorable title of Kentucky Colonel.

Once his education was complete, Cal followed a boyhood and life-long friend, Tom Porter, to Sacramento. His boyhood buddies  - Tom, Charlie Davis, and "Cig" Allen remained friends through their lives. We heard the many semi-notorious stories of Cal and Tom's youth, which they blamed on the faulty memory of Tom's mother. Mrs. Porter was a sharp-minded woman, so we all know those tales were true, and Cal did confess to many. 

Cal began his work career at Aerojet, then worked for Standard Oil in San Francisco. Cal's primary career was with Kaiser Permanente. He started at the Oakland Regional Offices and then moved to Sacramento as a Kaiser Regional Business Office manager for most of his working years.

Cal continued playing tennis several times a week at many local tennis clubs until age 77. When Cal gave up tennis, he focused on golf which he played until his early 80's. His last tennis club was Del Norte, where he enjoyed his "tennis mafia" friends. A small group of those friends made a couple of Saturday morning coffee visits a month with Cal until the end of his life. He treasured those male bonding times with Smokey Murphy, Steve Fong, and Bill Fanning. 

Cal's love for fruit and vegetable gardening almost matched his love of tennis. He became a Master Food Preserver through the UC Davis program. Abundant harvests not only became preserves but gifts to friends and family; community groups also benefited from his bounty.

He was a frugal and handy person, a true child of the depression. 

We remember his passion for ice cream, tomatoes, peaches, corn, and savory snacks. 

Cal loved to travel in Canada and Europe with his wife of 32 years, Karen Poirier-Brode, MD, who he has left to mourn. Karen says, "We rubbed along in life, sometimes like sandpaper, but forgiveness, optimism, Cal's patience and ultimately our love made it work."

He adored his family and delighted in the young ones - doing magic tricks, teaching kids to cheat at Rummy, and going fishing. 

A large and wonderful blended family remembers him with love - sons: Mike Barwick (Patty), Redding, Joe Barwick (Cathy), Folsom, Paul Barwick (Haily), Folsom, Bob Barwick (Angie), Aptos, Ryan Evans, Taipei, Taiwan, and stepsons, Chris Brode (Laurel) and Joe Heffernan, Jr. of Sacramento. His loving family included grandchildren Austin (Christine), Amanda, Taylor, Bridgett, Madison, Donovan, Brandon, Dylan, great-grandson Joseph, niece "like a daughter" Danielle Poirier, and sister-in-law Joan Barwick.

Cal was preceded in death by his brother, John Lewis Barwick (Joan), and the half-brother he discovered late in life, John Calvin Barwick.

Calvin will be interred with honors at the Sacramento Valley National Cemetery in Dixon at a future date.

Cal is gone to be with his beloved MawMaw and play golf for quarters with his good friend, Del Skaggs.

 

I'm so very fond of telling stories in Scrapbook pages

 I have taken a renewed interest in my personal passions. I'm working on my podcast, but that is going slowly.

I've organized my craft room and have space to scrapbook and do painting and drawing.

I'm planning on more book-making in August if all goes well.

Recently, I'm not just scrapbooking but doing scrap challenges. For example, I did the layout-s-day challenge with ScrapHappy in May.

I put together a scrapbook kit for Counterfeit Kit Challenge and used it to make several pages and cards. There was one last page that I did not complete but got started to work on another time.

The May Counterfeit Kit Challenge was based on Eat, Play, Love by Close to My Heart.

Here's my version of the kit:

Also, here is LO's and cards I created from the kit:

Now, CKC encourages making some elements of the page by hand. I did some mixed media backgrounds on two pages and did some hand stitching on a couple. I did not add much from my stash to augment my kit to make these pages. I definitely used up the paper from the kit and made a significant dent in the embellishment collection I compiled in it.

At some point, I'll put together a collage of my May LOAD pages. I feel so proud of myself for completing all 31 LOAD pages. And, I made several more pages last month "just for fun!"

Spring is rushing into summer here in NorCal this mid-May. Not very hot yet, but the roses came out in a flurry right on time for Mother's Day and have now settled into a steady blooming pattern.

I mentioned in the last post that I love Scrapbooking, and I've been at it this month. ScrapHappy.org has the yearly May LOAD going, and I'm keeping up. I was late posting one day, but I have an acute ruptured disc in my back, so doing anything is pretty amazing.

It's a setback as it is in a pretty tricky spot and my doctor checks on me. I'm doing the usual - prednisone and physical therapy - stretching. Avoiding much impact, etc. Lying down and standing a while were giving me the most grief before the steroids. 

As I take up this post again, last day for steroids and feeling pretty good.

My life is so quiet these days. Being at home has made me understand the power of the goddess Hestia.

Jean Shinoda Bolen talks about archetypes and how we can use them. Hestia, the goddess of the household, heals with tasks and routines, and rituals. All very important. I think cleaning up and trying to do a scrapbook page a day connects me inside of myself. 

I'm working on a podcast interview I did over a year ago to get it ready to put on my site. I have another fascinating discussion to review, too. Several ideas for guests are in my mind as well. As the stress of this past year ebbs, developing ideas takes shape, and I look to being very productive with things I love.

I love Scrapbooking

 

Today is iNSD, international National Scrapbook Day, and the start of a month-long challenge at ScrapHappy.org, where members try to create and post a new layout every day. I love the challenges. Scrapbooking is basically a collage way of telling stories. In this challenge, I use sketches and templates (like this one from Fiddle-Dee-Dee.)  

I change them up a lot, and while I may use kits of design elements, they are rarely one kit. The kit elements I used here are all from Lynn Grieveson Designs, as this is a Digi page.

I like both Digi and "lumpy" scrapbooking. I used to call it paper, but a friend, George, inspired this term. As I like to pile on embellishments, it seemed an appropriate description. It's not fine art. It is storytelling, and I find it a lot of fun.

There are many methods of storytelling, scrapbook pages in various sizes, pocket style, illustrated journals, mini-books, and just using social media, like FB and blogging. I tend to do 12x12 scrapbook pages and use this site and Facebook for my stories.

I try to use art principles on my pages and check my pages for Leah Dickenson's page rules - color, texture, pattern and shine. I think it hones my collage skills to scrapbook.

My albums are a combination of digital and "lumpy" pages, and pages get assigned to albums depending on the subjects of the pages - like this one will be put in the Karen & friends album.

I like the social aspect of this hobby, too. These days it's mostly online. I am considering an in-person crop next week. I believe there will be proper precautions with distancing and limited numbers. I have a personal HEPA filter, will wear two masks, and take frequent outdoor breaks. I do not plan to eat or drink around others. (A shame, snacks are a usual part of an in-person crop).